Mr. Bean

We just happen to own the entire Mr. Bean series on DVD. It's a purchase from long ago. You know...pre-kids and all. I think back to the first time I watched Mr. Bean and vividly remember laughing to the point of tears. The guy is freakin' hilarious...especially if you enjoy slapstick comedy. No one runs into a wall like Mr. Bean. I got to thinking about those DVDs the other day and tried to remember if there was anything inappropriate in them for kids and I couldn't really come up with anything bad. So seeing as how the kids love laughing at funny stuff in movies, I thought about how perfect it would be to play it for them. We went over to my folks' house for Memorial Day hamburgers and hot dogs (yum!) and I remembered that upon our full series purchase, I gave my 'Best of Mr. Bean" to my parents on VHS. I slapped that baby in the ol' VHS player, sat back, and waited to see if it would be a hit with Alex.

I'm not sure what made me laugh harder. Mr. Bean's crazy antics or Alex's gut-busting laughter. That kid was laughing so hard he starting coughing! That's asthma for ya. No worries though. There wasn't an actual asthma attack, just some coughing. When we turned it off for dinner he was severely disappointed and has talked nonstop about Mr. Bean since. We popped in the DVD today and he was back to gut-busting laughter again and I just can't help but laugh with him. Abby laughs, but she's not quite 'there' yet with that stuff. I never expected it to be such a hit, but anything that can make my kid laugh like that has got to be a winner. I suspect we'll be watching more tomorrow. Hip-hip-hooray for British comedy! :-)

The Cage Review: The Rock

I've seen The Rock several times but the last time I watched it was probably years ago. I watched it this past week and I forgot how much I absolutely love this movie. It doesn't hurt that it is also a Michael Bay movie. Mr. Bay stole my geeky heart with Transformers so it was a definite plus. Who doesn't love a good round of massive explosions, right?

So The Rock (1996) is basically about an unhappy U.S. Marine (Ed Harris) who doesn't like the way his fellow/former troopers have been dishonored. So he decides to take matters into his own hands by stealing a large number of deadly missiles in an attempt to persuade the higher ups of the ol' U.S.A to give him millions of dollars to honor those that were lost at war. And what better way to convince everyone of the honor of military than to hold several people hostage on Alcatraz with a bunch of angry...and possibly crazy...marines who would follow him unto the very end of the world. Er...at least until the end of California as that is where the missiles are aimed. The only problem is that no one knows how to get into Alcatraz, a.k.a. The Rock, undetected except one man: John Mason (Sean Connery), ex-British intelligence agent with an uncanny knack of escaping any prison. Problem: The only one able to disable the deadly nerve-gas missiles is Dr. Stanley Goodspeed (Nicolas Cage). He's a...well...dare I say Geeky?...chemical-weapons specialist with the FBI who is not exactly a fighter. But the lives of several hostages depend upon his higher brain function. Will he save the day and rescue the bay? (*Cue dramatic music*)

Okay. I. Love. This. Movie. I laughed a lot, even though I've seen it before. Nicolas Cage's one-liners in this movie are absolutely brilliant and hilarious and he delivers them as only Mr. Cage can. Sean Connery is awesome (big surprise there) and Ed Harris does a great job. Don't worry folks, true to form. Mr. Bay (director) does the military proud because despite the anger of the Ex-marines, they are not monsters and don't really wish to bring harm. (well...maybe a couple of them do but they are psychopaths.) This might actually be right up there as one of my favorite Nicolas Cage movies, if not in my top two. Mr. Cage, sir? You done me proud again. Five stars out of five on the Cage Review chart.

Star Wars Fan: Fail

So here I sit at my computer in a quiet house at 9:30 at night. And I'm not even at home. I finally made it out to my brother and sister-in-laws house for the week. The kids are having a wonderful time while enjoying the company of their cousins. It's been a...well...interesting trip, to say the very least. We got here yesterday and have had almost non-stop rain the entire time. To add to the fun weather, we spent an hour hunkering down in the cellar of their basement today. Lots of kiddos, Heather, and me with a TV blinking on and off of the horrible weather reports. Tornadoes were touching down all around and it was less than bleak outside. I must admit that I was not thrilled at the condition of the sky. But, aha! There was golden beam of hope on the horizon for the evening. Plans had been made to treat all of the kids to their very first viewing of Star Wars: A New Hope. Family movie night with one of the greatest movies. Ever.

Here's the beauty of the situation. Ben asked me if I could bring my trilogy on DVD, as he has yet to purchase it. Not a problem, right? I mean, I have two copies on DVD so easy cheesy! In the crazy packing time, I grabbed the three DVDs that were all (as far as I knew) sitting on my shelf in perfect order. So I went to my suitcase this morning to grab the DVDs to show the kids and lo and behold...I grabbed the wrong three. Two oddly unfamiliar bonus Star Wars discs and Return of the Jedi. A small knot formed in my stomach as I realized that me, an avid Star Wars fan, failed to bring the right three movies. I wracked my brain for a way out of the situation. I considered escaping to Wal-Mart to purchase them and then realized the likelihood of actually finding them. I slowly pondered my option of driving home and getting them when no one was looking, but I was fairly certain that after being missing for eight hours, they'd notice I was gone. I slumped into the kitchen to break the news to several bouncing, happy children who were all jumping with joy at the idea of watching Star Wars. It was promising candy only to serve them liver and onions instead. So, all in all, I think I single handedly ruined everyone's evening and I'm fairly certain my 'cool Aunt Jessie/sister' status just dropped way down. It was one big, all-around, FAIL. Good news though. We didn't get sucked up by a tornado. That's gotta count for something...right?

That's what friends do

You know how you say something to your kid and never stop to actually think about how they might use it against you some day? Sometimes you stop and wonder if those little life lessons you teach them from such a young and impressionable age are actually going to stick with them. Will it ever make a difference if you tell them 100 times a day to say 'please' and 'thank you'? You watch from across the room as one kid rips a toy out of the other kids hand only to have an all out slapfest ensue quickly afterward as you desperately try to teach them that hitting is wrong and sharing is good. Eat your vegetables. Don't spit. Say 'Yes ma'am'. Don't spit your gum out on the sidewalk. Blah, blah, blah. Today I discovered that the answer is yes. Yes they do listen. They don't always act accordingly, but they do listen. I've been preaching night and day that we share our toys because that's what friends do. They share. So the a-ha moment happened tonight:

The kids are outside playing after their generous dinner of fish-sticks, apples and soy-milk with cookies for dessert. I, being the last on the pecking order of people who actually eat in this house, disappeared for a moment to grab a banana for myself. I begin to peel said banana.

From across the yard, two happily playing children B-line for said banana. I go to take a bite and Alex reaches up, hand open, and says, "Mom, can I please have that banana?"

I say, "You ate your dinner, this is my banana."

Alex replies, "Now mom, can you share your banana with me please? Because that's what friends do. They share."

I smile, victorious that a lesson has been sufficiently taught and then promptly surrender half my banana to Alex and the other half to Abby. Through my smiles I realize that I'm still hungry and get another banana that I ate in secret in the dark corner of the garage.

Lesson learned...at a price.

Now what?

Somebody pass me a shovel please. Because I need to find a way to dig us out of the hole that the Union buried us in. There is a dark cloud indeed, floating above my head today. This is the part where you would assume that I tell you the inevitable news that Josh got his most current pink slip. But that moment will have to wait until another day. I'd like to be able to say that this is good news, but alas...it is not. First of all, you must understand that Josh's current employer is a wonderful man who is keeping Josh employed for the sole purpose of keeping him off of the bench and off the path of unemployment. Problem: This guys business has slowed down exponentially since last year. This is bad. How bad? Turns out that last year, his boss proceeded to tell Josh, was very slow. This year? Much slower.

Not. Good.

His boss, (the owner and only other employee left besides Josh) told Josh a very uplifting thing. He said that whenever Josh wants to jump ship just to say the word and he'd give him the pink slip. Encouraging, right? Even more encouraging is the fact that the owner's son jumped ship last week for a much more promising job. So seeing as we have a whopping two whole weeks left of unemployment to claim for the year, we have decided to stick out his current job in hopes of matching the pay of unemployment. Sadly, Josh has gotten a grand total of 5.5 hours of work this week. Shocking, isn't it? So it has become time to weigh our options once more. Out of my sheer (and seemingly morbid) curiosity, I thought that today would be a good day to call the Union and see what the bench is looking like. I thought that perhaps work was picking up and things would be promising if he were to take his boss up on the pink slip offer. Would you like to know how many people (state-wide) are on the bench? Yes? You asked for it...

273 Journeymen and 45 Apprentices. That's 318 people at the mercy of the Union waiting for a job.

Three-hundred and eighteen.

*sigh*

Forget the shovel. We're gonna need a backhoe.

Disappointment

Do you ever just wake up with all intentions on setting in motion the great plan of the week, only to have those plans foiled? Yes. Well, that would be my morning in a nutshell. I had made plans about a month ago to spend this week with my brother and sister-in-law and their kiddos. Summer vacation has begun for my three nieces and the last time we went out their way was a speedy 24 hour whirlwind trip. Alex and Abby were sad to be rushed out of there so quickly so I made plans for the three of us to take a four day trip to spend some quality time with the family. I gotta admit it. I was actually really excited to go. It would be great for the kids and would make my week a bit less mundane. Not to mention I was going to get a lovely spinal adjustment from my super-awesome-chiropractor brother-in-law. (which I am quite beyond need of. Exactly how much ibuprofen can you take in a year before it becomes unhealthy?) And what about Josh, you say? Well, work is slow, but he is employed (in the loosest form). Though hours are minimal at best, he needs to be here in case he's called in. Was he sad to see us go to see his family, leaving him behind...alone? Pardon me while I take a moment to laugh hysterically...

Bahaha hahahaha BAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Um...yeah. Sad was the exact opposite of his emotional response to the situation. His plans involved lots of movies that I despise, World of Warcraft, steak dinners (thanks to his folks), late nights, World of Warcraft, no kids screaming, no wife casting annoyed glances at his constant World of Warcraft obsession, Mountain Dew, oh....and World of Warcraft. Did I mention that already? My bad.

So I woke up this morning to a phone call from Heather. My poor nieces caught a stomach bug. Blasted stomach bugs. I didn't want to spend the entire trip caring for vomiting children so the great vacation to the in-laws is postponed. Alex, being the wise little kid he is, actually told me he didn't want to go because he "doesn't want to throw up." Smart kid. I think my level of melancholy was slightly elevated above that of my kids. I'd already packed and everything. So plans being foiled and all, I suppose I'd better get busy discarding the evidence of my planned trip. I baked a batch of cookies and some rice crispy treats to take with us. There goes my weight loss goal.

My blogger ate it

No. Honest. I swear that I'm not avoiding my blog. Actually I've been trying to write for the last couple of days and haven't been able to due to blogger maintenance. Actually I could have written yesterday but I was watching the series finale of Smallville. *sniff* It's all a matter of priorities you know. You obviously see where mine are. Tom Welling in leather trumps blog. Simple as that. Anyhow, it turns out that half my comments were erased as were my drafts for blogs due to great blogger issues. Go figure. I heard that was the case for even the most famous of blogs so I don't feel so bad. So seeing as how I have been absent in blogging for yet another week I'll start things off with some photos. My poor digital camera isn't getting the same amount of use it used to. We're going to the zoo tomorrow so I'll have to dust it off and see if I can't snap a few good pictures.

Abby love the black stallion so any black horses are her favorite thing in the world. Can you tell? There are six black horses in this photo. Can you find them?

After that picture of Abby, Alex asked me to take one with some of his favorite things. Notice he is wearing his Wiggles shirt, holding Sam Wiggle and sleeping on his 1982 Empire Strikes Back pillow case (it's transparent now because it's so thin).

Abby found a 'ballerina' leotard that Aunt Heather sent to us. She's in love and dances all over the house with it. Too cute.

The four amigos on one of many play dates. They are all good buddies. Isn't Gre


Alex...being Alex.

And who doesn't love a good photo of a dead cat? Not really. She's sleeping. But in a very odd place and in a very odd position. Weirdo Jasmine.