The Pumpkin Patch 2014

We haven't been to the pumpkin patch since Abby was in preschool. Alex hasn't been there since he was in preschool. Abby asked me several times if we could go to the pumpkin patch and I started thinking, 'why not?' So off we went! In pre-k, we went as a group and got the group discount, so I didn't realize how expensive it would be to take the whole family. It was fun, regardless. It was actually quite hot that day and we were all pretty sweaty after a couple of hours. I even got Josh to go with us, which is a rare thing these days. So that was nice. The kids had a lot of fun and to make the trip even better, I took them to Sonic to get cherry limeades and to the store to get pumpkins (much cheaper than the ones at the patch). It's funny watching how involved Evie is at this age. Things are getting easier with her. (You know...when she's not climbing bookshelves or handing me her poop.) I'm kind of sad that October is over. But next stop...Turkey day!

Poetry by Alex

Alex has been writing poems lately. It's kind of strange to think my eight-year old is writing poems. The funny thing is that they really aren't that bad. You know...for a kid. Actually, it's probably better than what I could come up with. But then again, I really don't like poetry. Josh, being a fan of poetry, is pretty happy that his kid is interested in the subject. So without further ado, I give you the poetry of Alex. (I will leave in his spelling for your entertainment. Think phonics.)

A Mummy that's a Dumby

By: Alex

Once there was a mummy that was a dumby.

He was not a chubby that patted his tummy.

But he patted his tummy.

But he was a dumby,

that old chubby mummy.

 A Shark in the Dark

By: Alex

Once there was a shark named Clark.

Clark lived in an aquarium.

Clark had a brother named Bark.

And a sister named Fark.

Clark played in a park.

An animal that was at the park was a shark.

But we were in the dark.

A Frankenstein Named Frank

By: Alex

Once there was a Frankenstin named Frank.

He had a tank that drove to the bank.

And he had a dog that stank.

Frank alwas got a spank.

But the spank did not hurt.

Surprise Visit

We had a surprise visitor this month. I was minding my own business at home, when my mom unexpectedly knocked on my door. This isn't unusual, as she stops by very frequently these days. I told her to come in and went back to attending miss Evie. I heard her open the door again but didn't know why. Turns out that she was letting my baby bro, Aaron, into the house. He came around the corner and I just sort of...well...I stared at him. It took me a moment to process that he had to fly here all the way from California in order to be standing in my house. You have to understand that he lived around us for so long, that sometimes it doesn't really feel like he's gone and moved to the coast.

So Aaron got to visit for about four or five days and it was really great to see him. The kids had a great time seeing him too. They miss him. Uncle Aaron was in their life for pretty much always until he moved and got married. When it was time for him to leave, my kiddos were actually pretty bummed. They wanted to know why he had to go back again. I tried to explain that he is married to Aunt Shelly now and they live there, but they aren't really sure why he's not coming back. The good news is that we got to see him for awhile and celebrate his birthday while he was here. The bad news is that we probably won't see him again for another year. It's always weird for me to think that he isn't around. It's funny how you take things for granted through life. I used to be able to call him for help with a flat tire or something in a pinch. Now, he's living his life half a country away. I'm happy for him though. You can't always stay at home forever. While he was here, he gave Alex his birthday present - a Star Lord mask and gun set from Guardians of the Galaxy (favorite movie). He was pretty pumped about this and wears it daily. He also shoots everyone with his Nerf Star Lord gun every day too. Which isn't annoying at all. We had a big BBQ where everyone ate too much and felt horrible later for doing so. But that's sort of our 'thing' in the family. I will always hear my dad belch and tell everyone how badly he overate while rubbing his stomach on these occasions. My dad was the other reason Aaron came down. He hadn't visited dad's grave since the burial over a year ago. I can't imagine how rough that was on the kid. I go to his grave fairly often to talk to dad. We all miss him on these kind of fun occasions.

It was great having Aaron here and we hope to see him (and hopefully Michelle) again soon.

Uncle Aaron gave Evie her birthday present early. It was an Olaf stuffed toy. She loves it!

This picture cracks me up! Evie doesn't like the camera flash so when you tell her to smile, she closes her eyes.

They sure do miss their Uncle.

Alex's 8th Birthday

I got him an adventure vest. He loves it. Look at my big boy!

Eight years ago, I was sitting in the hospital in horrific pain and waiting to give birth to my first born. I'll never forget seeing him for the first time and how amazed I was at seeing this perfect little boy that I'd carried for over nine months. Fast forward to today and I have an eight year old boy, full of amazing talent and personality. It's amazing how fast he's grown. We went to go buy him another pair of shoes (he goes through a pair every two months) and he's in a size four. That is one size (men's shoe size chart) from my feet. Sometimes, when I'm out of socks, I go borrow a pair of his because they fit me so well. It's strange. But I'm so happy how he's growing up.

This year for his birthday, he wanted to stray from his shark theme. Though still into sharks, he has also found a new love - monsters. Frankenstein, mummy, wolfman, creature from the black lagoon...that kind of monster. He loves them and finds as many books about them that he can. I have no idea what got him started on it, but hey...whatever makes him happy. The great thing about monsters is that he has an October birthday. Halloween stuff is everywhere and that's what he wanted. So I think I may have made my best cake yet. I will make my kids fun cakes until they tell me they don't want them. That's my personal gift to them as Mom. He woke up last night to go pee and came into the kitchen to see if I was done decorating it. When he saw it, he flipped out. I'd say he was happy. Which made me happy, of course.

This year, there was no big party with friends. We kept it to just family. It was still great and he said to me tonight, "You know what mom? This was the best birthday ever!" Of course, he says that every year, but I'll take it. I'm so happy that Josh's family came to celebrate. Alex is always excited to see his cousins, Aunt Heather, and especially his Uncle Ben. It was a good day.

On another note, he did get to celebrate the his official birthday at the doctor's office. Turns out the kid got bit by a brown recluse spider over at Grandma's house. Oops. He's okay, but it's been a bit worrisome for me. The doc said it sounds like it's already starting to heal well, but we have to watch it for a week at least to make sure. Whew...what a birthday!

Before the party day, we had birthday soy ice cream sundaes to celebrate the official day.

Gotta love the cake decorating. Lovin' the cake this year though.

Cousins!

Almost Two

Evie is almost two. Two is also the number of times that she wakes up within the first two hours of putting her to bed at night. Also the number of hours I spend a day rocking her in the rocking chair. Oh...and it's also the number of inches I have to sleep on in my own bed thanks to her inability to sleep in her own stinking bed. Yeah. She's taking this whole number two thing pretty seriously. But that's okay. This too shall pass. Until then, I will admit that her cuteness throughout the day makes up for her insanity at night. This year for school pictures, I decided not to get Evie's done. Last year it was fine, but the prices went up and I just wasn't willing to donate a kidney to be able to pay for it. So I took pictures of her myself and that's what I'm having printed out to hang up on the wall. She can wait until Preschool to get the official pictures. So much cheaper this way. So, while I sit here and try to figure out just why my couch smells like urine, I'll leave you with Evie's adorableness.

Sports Kid

Alex is our sports kids. He loves all things sports. So when the first opportunity came to sign him up for something sporty, we took it. That started the summer after Kindergarten with T-ball. Then in first grade, he went on to play soccer and basketball. I think of all three sports, his favorite is probably soccer. It's outdoors and pretty demanding. His first year was rough because it just happened to be very cold and wet/icy for the games. Not a fun combo for any kind of sport, if you ask me (unless you're skiing, I suppose). From that moment on, he started playing soccer at school during recess with his buddies. When it came around for soccer again this year, I didn't even have to ask. He was going to sign up.

I'm happy to say that he did fantastic this year! It was awesome watching how far he'd come in just a year. He was dribbling the ball really well and had wonderful ball control. I was super proud of how many goals he made for his team. This weekend was his last game and, though I won't miss all the practices during the week, I will miss seeing his cute almost-eight-year-old soccer moves on the field. Luckily, this year we were blessed with amazing weather. It was warm and sunny for every game. Yay! I love warm and sunny. It's barely fall and I already miss summer. My mom came to every game (there were only four) and for his last game he was super pumped that his Aunt Mandy was there with her kids. Josh, unfortunately, has worked for most of his games. So I'm glad I video-taped a good part of this last game to watch later.

Another part of his great year for sports is that he won the poll for baseball AND soccer for picking the name of the team. His favorite football team is the New York Jets. So for four rounds of sports, he's been trying to get them to choose The Jets as the team name. For baseball, he actually won. They were officially The Jets and even got nifty shirts with logos on them. After winning the lotto with baseball and finally having his Jets team shirt, he was ready to try getting his next favorite thing on a team jersey - The Sharks. He is still shark crazy. And believe it or not, he won the poll again. His soccer team was called The Sharks. They even got real soccer jerseys instead of t-shirts. It was really great and worth the $25 to be on the team.

I decided to pull my camera out this time and get some footage and pictures of the kid in action. Go Sharks!

 

One year

One year ago today, I said goodbye to one of the greatest men in my life - my dad. It's been a year to remember but yet, also a year to forget in many ways. I still spend hours crying to myself when no one is watching. Sometimes, I'll be out shopping or just picking up the mail and I'll see a man walk by out of the corner of my eye. I blink and my heart skips a beat because it looks just like my dad. A couple of those times, the resemblance was uncanny and time slowed down as I awkwardly stared at the person who probably didn't even notice I was there. I come up with stories in my head and tell myself that maybe the government needed him for a secret project and he really did know a secret agent. They faked his death and he's still out there somewhere. Watching us from afar. Protecting us from unseen danger.

But then I blink again. And he's gone.

I told myself that first year would be the hardest. I can't prove that yet, but perhaps it is true. The first holidays each stung like salt in an open wound. First birthdays were nearly as bad. With each first that passed, I couldn't stopper the fresh pain that I felt. The scab over the hole in my heart was ripped off and I felt like I couldn't manage my emotions all over again.

But I survived.

One year ago, life turned upside down. Every day became the "new normal". I miss my dad. I miss him more today than I did yesterday and I don't think this will ever stop. I talk to him sometimes when no one is watching. I pretend he's out there with me when I'm taking a walk alone, telling me to keep going while smiling his goofy smile. When I'm driving, I feel the emptiness of the seat that he so often sat in when I took him to his many appointments. Too often, the pain peaks again still today. And for my mom, I can only pretend to fathom the heartache she must cope with daily. It's been a year. I never woke up from my nightmare like I hoped I would. At 8:36 p.m., October 3, 2013, I spoke to my dad for the last time for a whole two minutes. I don't remember if I told him I loved him or if I even said bye. I just remember talking to him about a tv show he was taping for me and my mom. I was in a rush to get the kids to bed and didn't have time to talk. I'll regret that moment for the rest of my life. If I would have talked longer, would he still  be here today? I was sure that when the clocked turned 8:36 p.m. on my phone, that I would blink one more time and open my eyes to one year ago. The phone would ring, and it would be him on the other line. I was so sure of this, that I stared at the phone until it turned. I waited one whole minute for the phone to ring, barely breathing. When it turned 8:39, my heart fell. I left the house, telling Josh I needed something from the store. For a whole year, I convinced myself that I was being taught a lesson from God and that he wanted me to live this year without dad so I could know how much he meant to me, in true It's a Wonderful Life fashion. The 'in denial' phase is over now. The pain is getting easier to deal with. But it's always there. Always reminding me how much I loved him. How much he meant...will always mean to me. It's been a year, and the pain is still here.

But I'm doing okay.

Miss you dad. Love you always.